i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
All I want is dick and wine.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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