True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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