i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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