just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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