"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
