I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
whose parrot is this?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
