names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
