White coat. Heels.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize