Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
