ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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