He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Four minutes until I can fart!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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