Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
