it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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