The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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