he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
