Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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