Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
