The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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