whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
