guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
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i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
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Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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