God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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