you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
