p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize