I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
