I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
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I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
In other news, I just burned my penis
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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