You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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