im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
