Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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