I just made out with a guy for $7.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
