thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
