And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
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Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
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At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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