hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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