I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
