then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
