i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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