my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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