so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
