I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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