doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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