I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
