My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
