oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
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I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
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Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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