perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
is it fun? or sober?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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