it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
how drunk are you?
Several
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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