did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
