great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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