I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Randomize
