He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
this hospital has no fireball
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
