do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
