Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
