Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
