The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
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